What is Self-Care?

Self-care refers to the practice of taking deliberate steps to nurture your mental, emotional, and physical health. It is not just about pampering yourself (though that can be part of it); it is about ensuring you are taking care of your basic needs and creating balance in your life. 

When we fail to prioritise self-care, we risk burnout, increased stress, and a host of physical and mental health challenges as well as becoming at risk to mental health disorders and physical disease. Conversely, regular self-care promotes resilience, emotional well-being, we become more aware of ourselves, and our inner self and we become more grounded and connected to the world around is and to others, enabling a better sense of fulfilment within our inner world and our outer world. 

Why Self-Care Matters

From a psychological perspective, self-care is crucial for maintaining emotional and mental health. When you consistently ignore your own needs, you may find it harder to cope with life’s challenges. You might also feel less engaged in relationships or less productive at work. A lack of self-care begins to erode your sense of self, and you can start developing behaviours and beliefs that decrease you feeling valued as a person. If you find it hard to take self- care, then you may have schemas or beliefs that are dysfunctional for you such as worthlessness and overcompensation for others. If you are finding it hard to value yourself enough to do self-care daily, please seek support to help you implement change. By prioritising self-care, you enhance your ability to function effectively and respond to stress in healthier ways. 

Self-care is not selfish it is necessary. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Taking time for yourself enables you to be more present, supportive, and productive in all areas of life. 

Different Dimensions of Self-Care

Self-care is multidimensional, and it is important to address all aspects of your well-being.
Here are a few key areas to consider: 

1. Physical Self-Care

• Why it matters: Mind and body are connected. Your physical health directly influences your mood, energy levels, and overall well-being. It matters because you matter. 
• How to practice it: Exercise regularly, get enough sleep, eat a balanced diet, and ensure regular check-ups with your doctor. Don’t overlook rest—allowing your body time to recharge is crucial.
  • Exercise can be gentle as in walking or more cardio as in going to the gym. Swimming or walking in the water is wonderful for those with joint issues etc. Any exercise is worthwhile, such as armchair yoga. 
  • Hot and cold therapy, sauna and then an ice bath. 
  • Light therapy  
  • Massage of many types, professional support if required i.e. Chiropractor for needling, physiotherapist, Pain-management. 
  • Using skin lotions and healthy oils in your body  
  • Touch in general  
  • Yoga and sound work 
  • Vagal nerve stimulation 
  • Muscle relaxation techniques
    
    

2. Emotional Self-Care

• Why it matters: Keeping your mind sharp and engaged helps build resilience and improve cognitive functioning.
• How to practice it: Engage in activities that allow you to express and process your emotions.  
  • Talk to a friend, draw pictures that symbolically express how you feel or write down your feelings, eg: journalling or create a story about or role play it. 
  • Learning to identify where your feelings sit within your body ie in your heart, stomach etc.  Give them a colour to help express them and them imagine that colour changing into a more healing colour i.e. gold or blue and use breathing techniques at the same time. 
  • Learn to letting go techniques.
  • Use hypnotic apps to help express let them go 
  • Learn emotional resilience and emotional regulation techniques (these may require a therapist), seek therapy to address what is emerging in your emotions and thoughts if you cannot let them go. Or often we heal when we are being valued by someone else and sharing our feelings in thought will often begin the process of change and the process or our neurological brain pathways start changing and this helps change the feelings we are having. 
  • Stop four times a day, ask yourself, what am I feeling right now, where in my body am I feeling it and how can I express it, and work through it. For example, if its joy you may want to give a little skip, if its tension you may want to do a small muscle relation as clench your feet or hands hold then tight for a count of four and then release and do this four times.

3. Mental Self-Care 

• Why it matters: Keeping your mind sharp and engaged helps build resilience and improve cognitive functioning. Being aware of how you speak to yourself is extremely important in caring for you. 

• How to practice it: Challenge yourself to learn something new, engage in activities that stimulate your mind, like reading or puzzles, and practice mindfulness to stay grounded in the present moment.

• • Mental Care also involves identifying your inner voice, you know the one that tells you I want a cup of tea etc. and to learn how this voice speaks to you in various settings, Mental care involves restructuring and learning to have kind self- dialogue in all settings 

• • Also, practice new self -talk, talk kindly to self, displaying self-compassion—treat yourself with the same kindness you would offer to others. Reframe any self– negative statements with more realistic caring ones, ie I am learning to care for myself, I am learning not to call myself names when I make a mistake. Interrupt the old negative self –talk, by singing in your head, imagining a red stop sigh, even saying No in your head, I am not going to put myself down anymore.

4. Social Self-Care

• Why it matters: Human beings are social creatures, and maintaining strong, healthy relationships is crucial to mental health.
  • The level of social involvement varies from person to person and the number of social friends or connections also varies per person. That is fine as we are all different but social isolation harms us and is one of the causes of depression and low self-worth. 
• How to practice it: Find what you are comfortable with do it. This may be a social gathering such as a walking group, book group, gym class, party, a gaming group such as Dungeons and Dragons, volunteering at the local dog home (or wildlife park. Or it can be prioritising time with loved ones, reach out to friends or family when you need support.

   

5. Spiritual Self-C Care

• Why it matters: For many, spirituality offers a sense of purpose and connection to something greater than oneself. It is an important aspect of our sense of who we are, where we fit. There are many different spiritual beliefs and communities to explore. 
• How to practice it: Whether through religious practices, meditation, or spending time in nature, nurturing your spiritual side can provide peace and perspective.

   

Overcoming Common Barriers to Self-Care 

Despite knowing the benefits, many people struggle to incorporate self-care into their lives. Some common barriers include: 

• Guilt: You might feel guilty about taking time for yourself, especially if you are used to putting others first. 

• Time constraints: With busy schedules, it can seem impossible to carve out time for self-care. 

• Misconceptions: Many people think self-care is indulgent or unnecessary, when in fact, it is a critical component of well-being. 

To overcome these challenges, it is essential to remember that self-care does not have to be time-consuming or extravagant. Small, consistent actions can make a significant difference. It is about finding what works for you and making it a priority, even if it means saying “no” to other demands on your time. 

Creating a Personalised Self-Care Plan

Effective self-care is not one-size-fits-all. As a psychologist, I often encourage clients to create a personalised self-care plan that aligns with their unique needs and preferences. Start by asking yourself: 

• What activities make me feel replenished or recharged? 

• What are my biggest sources of stress, and how can I address them? 

• How can I incorporate small self-care practices into my daily routine? 

Whether it is as simple as taking five minutes of quiet time in the morning, scheduling regular exercise, or making space for hobbies, creating a plan that you can realistically stick to is key.

Final Thoughts

Self-care is a lifelong practice, not a one-off task. It is about cultivating habits that protect your well-being and allow you to thrive. As a psychologist, I often remind my clients that by investing in themselves, they are better equipped to handle life’s challenges and support the people they care about. 

Remember, self-care is not a luxury; it is a necessity. When you are available for your own well-being, you are not only taking care of yourself—you are laying the foundation for a healthier, more balanced, and fulfilling life.